Thank goodness yesterday, is yesterday.
I’m up early today, getting some things accomplished.
It’s amazing how different things seem when everyone is sleeping. I’d like to say that I will be making this ‘getting-up-early’ thing a new trend, but let’s be honest. Mommy likes her sleep. What little of it I get right now.
I can tell you that after yesterday, I slept like a rock for about 4 hours straight. Quite sure the imprint of my head is permanently encased in my pillow. I may not have slept long, but man did I need to recharge after yesterday.
Why? You ask. Well, I’ll let you in on a little secret.
Yesterday, was a hard day.
Yup- I said it. It was hard. Not out of the ordinary for routine, nothing really new or different, not horrible or terrible, just a hard day. and that’s okay.
Little Bear had a checkup at the doctors the day before. (She’s healthy and robust to say the least. Girl likes her meals.) This means that she had a few shots (my mommy-heart aches on shot days. The how-could-you tears. Dagger.) So she’s been a little cranky and extra snuggly, but nothing we can’t handle. Bubba, is Bubba. A two-year-old going on ten, with interests that change with the tides. Again, par for the course. BUT I will tell you, when the time is ripe and the stars don’t quite align, it makes for a hard day. Add to it some self-imposed deadlines and measures of worth and BOOM!
My patience was running a little low to start. Between the usual lack of sleep, cranky/snuggly infant and Bubba’s latest YouTube obsession not loading- times were ripe for a meltdown.
Guess what- there was a meltdown.
Guess who experienced the meltdown… Me. I held it together all day and thought I was doing a good job, especially for not being able to understand my sweet cherub’s stomping feet and sobbing diatribe about the wrong “Ryan’s Toy Review” several times that day. The straw that essentially broke me down was, get this, the laundry. For some reason I felt it had to be folded. Right then. With both kids awake. Upstairs away from the majority of our favorite toys.
“What in the heck, woman? WHAT were you thinking?” I know, right? That’s when I felt the turn.
I think as Mommys we sometimes put too much pressure on ourselves to get it done.
Did the laundry need to be folded right then? Nope, definitely not.
Did I have to empty the dishwasher before Daddy got home. Nope, totally could have happened when reinforcements arrived.
When the second cavalry came charging in from work (bringing dinner, mind you), boy did he have a surprise waiting for him. Three-minutes in, Bubba was melting down over not being able to adequately communicate the type of cup he wanted his smoothie in, Little Bear was crabbing and there I stood, tears running down my cheeks, over a smoothie-cup-meltdown.
“I’ve got this.” He said “Go take a moment and collect yourself.”
I felt defeated. Why couldn’t I just make it through the next couple hours and then let myself relax? Why was I upset now? Oh, that’s right, because I pushed myself too hard and ran myself too thin over too short a time trying to get it all done. All in time for a fictitious deadline I imposed upon myself. Superwoman, I am not. But a Good Mom, I am, I need to remember that part. If the laundry gets folded after the kids go to bed, so be it. If the dishwasher gets emptied while Daddy play trains, that’s cool too. If Costco comes out with a giant vat of patience in the next couple years, I’m investing.
For now, yesterday is yesterday, the sun is up another day and somebody wants Chocolate Muffins & Fries for breakfast. Not going to happen Bubba, but we can compromise. It’s okay.